You're a shark and I'm swimming

The fool understands the hierarchy of madness...

What does it mean to be happy in a moment?

Happiness of attitude is like a muscle; use strengthens it. Whatever HAPPENS to us, we should be determined to meet it positively.

my moon

  I watch the moon float quietly above me. I have a longing yet at the same time I never want to be satisfied, because satisfaction means the end of something, a stagnant energy that I could never bare. I watch the sun sleep with the moon, marvel as they rise together over the ocean...these visions, these are my dreams I keep safe. These are the dreams that cradle my connection to God. As the violet hues grow softer around me I chase a constant wave thrashing into the sand. I graze my hands along the millions of beige lovemakers, I feel them on my fingertips and everything comes alive. I am in a reverie. The moon waves goodbye and I will not fear his absence, for now is all I have and I am here.

The feeling of this song...it's like the fall that never leaves you, the story you always knew you had...

sparks

  Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and feel like I'm looking at a stranger. It's not real, this reflection. I'm not any more real than the next person. We all believe that we are special...maybe we are...all special. But we're not real. We're pretending in a physical form. We dress up like dolls to look like some kind of fictitious part. A part of what? Life?

Lose control

Dear friends...you are angels and drunks, you are magi. Old friends...you stuck a pin in the map I was in...and you are the stars I navigate home by... - Elbow

The universe has its own version of where we are headed...and there is so much to learn...

Then it's white- The Field

Metanoia excerpt

  

 Since I couldn’t find my way anymore I settled with the feeling of being lost. I could bob my head to a funky electronica beat while inhaling smoke from a hooka like nobody’s business.   Try to fuck with me, I alluded with my eyes. My anfractuous path was just beginning. I could feel it pulsating through me. The crowded room of candy kids were my allies, my friends, everything I always knew they could be. So what if I didn’t own a penny to my name. So what if he said he would write but never did. I didn't hold on to expectations. The universe took care of me and I knew it. 

Sadness keeps you connected

We are what we think

What good is living the life you've been given if all you do is stand in one place...

Call me on your way back home- Ryan Adams

Cue Sight excerpt

    It’s easy to lay down a cause, to wipe away the musky scent when you finally find the culprit. Letting anything linger for too long can throw you into a mighty fit of rage, for that’s when attachments form and God knows humans will always let down other humans. Then again sometimes you find these people and you look into their eyes and you feel they could never fail you, that your friendship will never falter because they are separate from the others; it is possible to differentiate them in a way where they are incapable of being a mortal of this world. Mind you I haven’t the time to divide such things in a cohesive sense, I just galavant through the social circle with hope in my heart that all of my lovelies are wise and true. 

  A piano sits in the corner of my room but I am not afraid. I do not allow it to drudge up any sort of remorse or insecurity I had as a child, watching my mother flail about with her agile hands below her, carrying her away to a world without children and unfaithful men. Those unfaithful men were the saddest I had ever seen, they flocked at each door as if it were their last, and hers the most glorious of them all. Ahead of them lie a frightening and lowly existence, however their love blinded them and all I could do was laugh my adolescent laugh right in their pathetic faces. Presumably they will deny all of this once they realize that their desires were nothing more than fiction, that my mother would never care about them once the damage that they had nothing to do with was done. She would string them along like dogs of fury, sometimes all of them at once (usually all of them at once) until the hair was pulled carefully from their bodies by her constant needs and pitiful begging. At a time where nothing mattered, where thoughts were seen as a vague existence of a life, she shot the dogs square in the head and watched the blood trickle out of their open skulls, tired and mangled, with a gleam in their eye that seemed to say they were relieved it was finally over. The crisis had dispersed and their souls were lifting towards the heavens to a world of comfort and certainty. 

Alexandra

  Alexandra wasn’t having what one would call a melancholy night. No, it surely wasn’t melancholy in a sense that she wasn’t enjoying herself. Why, the entire trek to the cinema she belted out Janis Joplin songs as they came on the rock-and-roll station (was it her birthday? It must have been her birthday. Or the anniversary of her death) and stared dreamily at the 101 freeway ahead of her, as if this land truly were her land and all of the quintessential Los Angeles glitter was temporarily flaking onto her old broken-down blue Chevy barely tugging along at 60 miles an hour. It was amazing to her how a movie could be so elating to her mood; it was as if the character’s story, no matter how happy or tragic or truthful, somehow intertwined with hers in a way where it all made a little more sense. Alexandra, on this night, made a little more sense. 

  Some people might say Alexandra was a mere integrant, a minuscule part of society. One might call her unassertive or meek, too careful with her words or too difficult to figure out. A hardcopy of brilliant literature was undoubtably her best friend, but those who knew her, really knew her, knew that she was simply hard to figure out. She made a constant mistake of giving in to this notion and used it as a deflect from the world. She never really wanted people to know who she was. She didn’t even like herself that much. Everything was a memoir and she wasn’t even satisfied with the story she had to tell. Truth be told...she didn’t really ever do anything of value. 

Suddenly I remember the smell of the ocean and I'm brought back to an unspoken understanding I had with the universe

Rolling Thunder- Alberta Cross

You were convinced there was no other place to go other than the dark side...

Adventure is something you seek for pleasure...but experience is what really happens to you in the long run; the truth that finally overtakes you. -Katherine Anne Porter

Almost Famous

Courage is contagious. You have to be brave with your life so that others can be brave with theirs.